"the truly natural things are dreams, which nature can't touch with decay."

It has been an especially troublesome month and half, to say the very least. Many a night of nightmares, run away worries; both real and likely imagined have plagued my sanity. I know in many I am not alone but I don't take solace in misery loves company. I don't expect a magician or a white night to appear and make it right again either. But fortunately I have found here and there people who have walked very similar experiences and are now in such a better place. It is those stories and conversations that keep me going. Prevent me from further isolating myself. I have had to create some distance from those who at one point provided some comfort. However I think I have regained a bit of my spark and resigning myself or sitting around having a coping party is no longer working for me. Even if the odds are stacked against me I need to again believe I will be that one out of five. I don't know how or when, but each day I have to somehow will it. Believe it.